Policy Change

Letter #1: Due to skyrocketing candy consumption, Allergan’s will no longer provide unlimited free candy bars to employees. An “honor system” can has been placed in the candy basket, and all are asked to pay 35 cents for each bar taken. In the long run this will almost certainly cost less than the larger-sized clothes you would have been buying, had the chocolate intake...

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Introductions

Letter #1: We’re pleased to announce that Dr. Eric Malthouse, acclaimed as a daring interpreter of the works of Widor, will soon be visiting Collingwood. Dr. Malthouse is a 2001 graduate of the Paris Conservatoire and at present teaches privately in Centerville. We have scheduled a recital and a master’s class by Dr. Malthouse, to be held on August 14 and 15 respectively, and...

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New Contact

Letter #1: When I saw you last, you asked me to keep an eye open for the right kind of tour guide to work out of your public relations office. As you put it, “I’m looking for a geologist with a broad smile.” I thought I’d drop you this quick note to tell you about a charming new student of mine who fits the bill perfectly. His name is Steve Tessa. A rock hound since...

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Employee Sickness

Letter #1: I am sorry to report that Nhu Tran has been hospitalized for observation regarding a recurring health problem. As some of you know, she has been taking medication for an ulcer for the past few months, but the problem persists. Although her desires are to be at work, her doctor insists that she undergo more tests. If all goes well, she expects to be back on Monday. In the meantime,...

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Own Retirement

Letter #1: It’s time to express my appreciation for the great friendships I have had here at Derekson’s over the past years. As some of you know, I am retiring at the end of May and plan to move to my old hometown of Footscray. I hope to do some writing on the history of that area before all the early residents are gone. I know Derek has been considering two candidates for my...

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